I had my third chemo yesterday. It’s been 6 weeks. Everything went smooth. I’ve been meditating lately and recently read a book called Chakra for Beginners by David Pond. It’s a good read and in truth it’s been so helpful!!! I’m starting a 6 week class next week to learn more. Before chemo I meditated and I decided to wear a bright orange sweater for vigor and vitality. I had red tape on my arm for strength and courage. A scarf with the many colors of love. Also, tucked in my bra was a stone given to me from a young kid I met the other day at Bravado. He was making my tea. He asked where I’ve been. He’d missed seeing me. I told him Maui. As we talked, out of the blue he asked if I believed in healing stones. I replied. “funny you would ask. I just finished a book about chakra and have thought about getting some”. He reached into his pocket and pulled out 3 beautiful stones and handed them to me. I held them in my hand. One was for love, the other for increased spirituality and a crystal. We talked for a little while. I gave him back his stones. His name is Eric. He’s a Super awesome kid. He came around the corner and gave me a hug. He then pulled out a stone and gave it to me. It’s a beautiful stone for love. He wanted me to feel the love and send it back to the universe. I was so touched I cried. Since I’ve began meditating I’ve had some real spiritual connections. I know it’s weird but I firmly believe God is sending some blessings my way. Going through chemo is no cake walk. I have to admit, it’s tough. Not just on me but everyone who has to go through it. We don’t all have the same experiences, same side effects or even the same cancer but what we all have in common are the same fears, the same emotional ups and downs but more importantly the same determination and will to fight so we can live. Last night I had an allergic reaction. I couldn’t swallow. I called my doctor and he told me to take a steroid and get some Benadryl. I’ve never taken Benadryl before so luckily I bought the children’s version because I passed out on the floor. I was drooling and this morning I had a hangover. I haven’t had one of those in 12 years. Keep in mind all this from a teaspoon of cherry flavored children’s formula Benadryl. What can I say? I’m a light weight.
Yesterday as the nurse was changing my bag and loading up the big guns, I happened to look on the tray and noticed a bell sitting there. Apparently my nurse had placed it there for me to ring whenever I needed her. I immediately thought of my dear friend Rose Springfield. Rose was one of my dearest and oldest friends. She had known me since I was born. She was one of my dads best friends. Rose was a feisty 4’11” spitfire with a big heart. This woman was not only funny but she had a heart filled with so much love and compassion that she captured the hearts of everyone she met. She was infectious. Sadly she passed away 2 years ago leaving behind a void in so many hearts. But she also left behind memories filled with so much happiness and love. As I said, the bell reminded me of Rose. Rose called me several years ago. She called because she needed me to do her a favor. That crazy nut was at times demanding and a pain in my butt. I never knew what she’d ask me to do but I always knew that whatever it was I would be sure to oblige no matter how outrageous the request was. I really loved her. Rose wanted me to buy her a bell. I asked “why on earth do you need a bell?” Rose replied “well Val. (She always called me Val) I need a bell so I can ring it everytime I need something. Even if I’m in my room”. Typical Rose. I couldn’t help but laugh. I knew buying her that bell would send her son and daughter over the edge so that day I went to the local boutique and bought her a lovely porcelain bell to ring, ring ring!!! She was elated. Unfortunately her son and daughter, not so much. They were furious with me. Rose drove them crazy with her constant ringing of that bell!!! I didn’t care. I loved Rose so much. She was like a mother to me. As I said, I’ve been meditating lately. On Sunday as I meditated I thought about my dad and Rose. I had so much love in my heart for them while they were alive and still today that they are both gone. I thought about the people I loved so much that had such an impact on my life that have passed away. My cousin Alonzo, my father in law (grandpa Bob as we called him) and my Aunt Lili. I asked them all to be my angels and watch out for me. More importantly I asked Rose and my dad to send me a sign that they heard me. That night as I was on the Lanai looking up at the stars, praying for everyone, myself included, I talked to my dad and Rose. That’s when I saw the most spectacular shooting star. Yesterday after seeing the bell, I reached out to Rose’s daughter on Facebook. I posted a picture of the bell along with the story behind it. I received a private message from Rose’s daughter telling me that about a week ago she had dreamed about her mother. Keep in mind she hadn’t dreamed about her mother since she passed away 2 years ago. Rose came to her in a dream with a message. She wanted her daughter to let me know that I’d be Ill for awhile but that everything would be fine and I would heal beautifully. Tears filled up my eyes as I read the email. I’m still teary eyed as I write this. Her daughter had been afraid to call me a week ago because she thought I’d think she was crazy. I’m so glad she reached out to me yesterday. My battle with breast cancer has been a roller coaster ride. It’s hard but I can’t begin to tell you how blessed I feel to know I have angels in heaven watching over me. Rose was a blessing in life and while she is no longer with us her compassionate heart and the love she had for others still shines like a bright light. There were 2 funny people in my life that always had a way with making me laugh. They had the biggest hearts I’ve ever known. They cheered me up when I was down and always, always had a way with saying the right thing at the right time. I miss you dad and I miss you Rose Springfield too. I would like to believe that the 2 of you are in heaven joking around, bringing cheer and laughter to everyone in heaven and still ringing that crazy bell. Thank you for filling my life with so much happiness and thank you for being my angels. With angels like the both of you watching over me, how can I lose?